Saturday, December 25, 2010

Hans Zimmer, My Farewell to the Holidays, and Giving in to Robert Jordan

It's Christmas, obviously, and I just finished watching Inception with my mother. I saw it in the theater when it came out, and I'm pretty sure I'll never forget the end of the movie. Not for the "WTF WTF WTF" moment (if you've seen it, you know what I mean) but for the music. Hans Zimmer rules my life. I swear to god when I was in the theater, and that music was booming at me like a jet engine, I had one of my music nerdgasms and almost teared up. The first time scores of movies really got me was when I was like eight. It was Princess Mononoke. I have precious memories of laying in my white day-bed at my dad's house with my portable CD player. I would literally be lying there in the dark trembling with the awesomeness. Nothing really rivals that feeling when I first hear a new movie score that hits me like a train. I've been hitting the preview button in iTunes for the ending music to Inception over and over for about half an hour. I'm waiting for my friend to email the track to me so I don't have to pay $1.29.

But Christmas is over, and this year pretty much does it for me and the holiday season. I'm dumping you for good, holiday season. For years I wanted to think you were magical. That it was a time for joy and love. But it's not. It's not at all. And I'm done living in a fairy tale. Because one person wanting to think the season is about joy and love, in a sea of people who act as though it's about being selfish and idiotic, can't do one single thing. And I no longer have the strength to really believe in my own beliefs anymore.

Wow, iTunes just busted me on how many times I've listened to that preview. Apparently I'm cut off. Jerks.

Anyway, I'm probably going to read for the rest of the night. I finally gave in to Robert Jordan, after being skeptical for years because of the really awful covers on those books. I wanted to believe they were probably crap. I don't know why. I really don't. Especially when there's like twelve of them and the quote on the front of the first one says something about Jordan opening up the world that Tolkien had just started to create. I mean, a quote like that would make anyone want to find out what could possibly be better than Tolkien. But I turned up my nose for years. And now, damn it to hell, I'm hooked, albeit mildly turned off from the ridiculous tendency to name EVERYBODY, even characters who have no need of names. But hopefully that track from Inception arrives soon, and I can blast it over and over to my heart's content.

Monday, November 29, 2010

A $400 Remote Control and That Time I Finally Bought a DSi

I'm not even gonna mess around today. This remote I saw on on Black Friday demands your attention. It is the Logitech Harmony 900 Rechargeable Remote with Color Touch Screen. It is $399.99, currently on sale for something like a hundred dollars short of ridiculous. But it's still ridiculous. I think my tech-loving soul bits shriveled up and died a little bit when I saw this thing. Why in god's name would anybody need this. A TOUCH SCREEN? On your remote control? It's not even a remote-controlled car. It's just a remote control. That thing that you flip through channels with at 3 AM while bawling your eyes out and eating slices of colby jack cheese because it's the closest thing to ice cream in the house. That thing that's lost more often than Oceanic 815.

Since I didn't really want to waste my life reading the lengthy product description, here's what I got from skimming it. It has a touch screen. Does this mean I can play Angry Birds? Or Doodle Jump? If not, it's not worth $400. Apparently the big selling point for this thing as that you can point it at cabinets, where electronic devices are cleverly hidden, and use them without revealing those ugly aforementioned electronic devices to the world. I haven't been in any house recently that has all of their electronics hidden in cabinets. Then again I don't exactly run around with the kind of crowd who can afford a $400 remote control. A lot of people actually like to have their gadgets out, because generally the more crap you have around your TV, the cooler you are. I don't want to hide any of my awesome gadgets. The only cool thing about this is that it's rechargeable, but how often do you really replace the batteries in your remote anyway? I really don't even know what to think about this thing. I feel sorry for anyone who thinks they need it. As my friend Will said on Twitter: "That remote better have sex with me, then pick out new clothes for me to wear for the week." I think it should also build me an exact replica of the Hagia Sophia out of pure white chocolate and make all the arrangements for it to become my new house, but maybe that's asking too much.

I also bought a DSi. Because it's orange. And orange is my favorite color, dammit. And Golden Sun: Dark Dawn comes out tomorrow, but I'm too poor to get it. And I don't really have anything else to say for now, because I'm currently obsessed with watching the Cyber Monday deals on Amazon. But there will be more geekiness next time of course.

Friday, November 12, 2010

Sackboy Squee!

I would really like to take this opportunity to thank whoever put information about the Little Big Planet 2 Collector's Edition on the Playstation RLS website. Because if they hadn't done that, I may be sitting here writing a post entitled "Dear Love: I'm Dumping You Forever" which would be far less fun, cute, or interesting to anyone. But no, I give you bookends! And Sackboy plushies! And AMAZING DLC CONTENT!

I wish every collector's edition came with awesome stuff like this one does. Now don't get me wrong, I loooove art books. But something like that just doesn't fit Little Big Planet. They need cuteish stuff and DLC costumes and freaking BOOKENDS. Because I have a lot of books. And when somehow my little fantasy book world and videogame world come together in a kind of awesome smelting fusion, you better believe I'm excited.

So if you're like me and you like lists telling you about all of the stuff you need [want] in a collector's edition you go (from

  • A copy of LittleBigPlanet 2 – duh.

  • Your own little “Sackboy” – 7” of plushie-goodness for you to accompany you on your journey thru LBP2.

  • Exclusive LBP2 “game ends” – keep your PS3 games in a tidy, organized and ‘Sack-ured” within these unique bookends

  • One stop shop for exclusive DLC + more – regarding in-game content, the LBP2 Collector’s Edition comes packed with 11 different pre-order costumes, including:

    • Disney / Pixar’s Toy Story 3’s “Aliens” Sackboy Costume

    • Disney’s TRON: Legacy “Clu” Sackboy Costume

    • The Muppets’ “The Great Gonzo” Sackboy Costume

    • PlayStation’s “Ratchet” Sackboy Costume

    • PlayStation’s “Clank” Sackboy Costume

    • Even More Animals’ “Crocodile” Sackboy Costume

    • Even More Animals’ “Vulture” Sackboy Costume

    • Even More Animals’ “Cobra” Sackboy Costume

    • Even More Animals’ “Mandrill” Sackboy Costume

  • And exclusive to the LittleBigPlanet 2’s Collectors Edition:

    • PlayStation’s “Jak” Sackboy Costume

    • PlayStation’s “Daxter” Sackboy Costume

    • 5 exclusive LBP2 PSN Avatars – Lastly, complete your PlayStation experience with a new identity on the PlayStation Network with these new avatars.

So you basically want all of this. Just admit it. From what Playstation's blog says, those first few costumes will be done as preorder bonuses unless you get the CE. Best Buy's is the Alien costume, Gamestop's is the Tron costume, and's is the Ratchet and Clank costumes. Apparently all the preorders come with the four animal costumes. MANDRILL FTW.

Tuesday, October 5, 2010

Dear Consumers: You Suck

Dear consumers*:

You suck. You suck so bad I could just go wild and write a blog post about how angry you make me. I am really beside myself right now. Incase you have no idea what my damn problem is, I refer you to this article, although there are now MANY like it. SunChips are pulling their compostable bags. Why, you ask? What could possibly make them stop using such a wonderful product to promote sustainability and awareness? Did it cost too much to produce? That must be it, as any other explanation would border on insanity.

No, my friends. They're pulling it because it's too noisy.

That is why I hate you, consumers of America. You are so whiny that you're making us take a huge step back in the push for more eco-friendly products. Can you imagine how many SunChip bags there are? Everybody loves them. A year and a half ago that bag seemed like an important moment in the world of Americans and their love of stuff. Anything could have come next.

But the bag was noisy. Too noisy, apparently, for lazy people who don't understand what's really important in the world. Too noisy for people to just ignore it for the good of the environment. For the sake of moving forward. So SunChips is going back to the regular bags for all but one of their six flavors, because they want to show they're still "committed." If I were SunChips, I'd tell all of the whining assholes to shove it. We can't do this to ourselves. We literally can't, because it's absolutely destroying us.

Here's something else I want to know. I want to see a serious letter that was sent to SunChips complaining about the bags. I want to know what kind of reasoning they gave that made SunChips do this. What kind of serious, valid points they made about the noise of the bag. I honestly can't think of any, and since I heard about this thing hours ago I've seriously been trying. You love SunChips but your baby is sleeping in the same room and you don't want to wake them up? Put the chips in a reusable container and the bag issue is gone. You love SunChips and you're at work and want a snack but don't want to annoy your cubicle neighbors? Put the chips in a reusable container. This. Isn't. Hard. Not only is this not hard, but it also cuts back on crumbs on your sleeves. AND if you're like me and you eat the whole chips before the broken ones or vice versa, you can find them right there in your big container without having to peer deep into the bag every time. A sealed container would even keep them fresher longer. I mean, come ON. It's so, so easy.

Now, I'm well aware that all of these articles say SunChips is working on its next set of compostable bags. This is obviously great. And they obviously won't be noisy, which is a good thing for America because you can't handle anything that inconveniences you in the slightest. I really wish this could have happened in a different way. I wish people could learn that they need to deal with things and find solutions to their own problems instead of whining and whining and whining. And the unfortunate thing is that the whiny people won out and made this happen. The minor inconvenience, which was in reality so easy to remedy, was apparently the most important thing here. So I hope you're all happy throwing your nice, quiet, non-biodegradable bags into the overflowing landfills. So sorry for the inconvenience.

*You can all blame @awhisperpoetic on Twitter for alerting me to this whole shebang. But I of course thank him. Also thanks to him is the link below to the petition to keep the compostable bags:

Tell Frito-Lay: Keep SunChips in Compostable Bags

Several Brief Reasons Why I Changed My Mind About Not Wanting an iPhone

First and foremost: Yes, I'm back from for some reason ignoring my blog. So now that that's out of the way.

I absolutely 100% hate my phone. It's just so wonky and annoying and I want to stab it with a kabob skewer. This is what I hate the most. I have a Droid Eris. So I'll be on the phone, calling some sort of hotline where I have to enter a phone number or some other number. I take the phone away from my ear to enter the numbers, and the touch screen turns on to allow me to do so. That's perfectly good. Except as I'm entering said numbers, half the time the screen literally just shuts off while I'm in the middle of typing. WTF. And then in my attempts to get the screen to come back on, which involves me raising and lowering the phone to my ear like a damn moron and mashing random buttons in anger, the call ends. So then I must go through all of this again. Basically, this phone

Tuesday, June 29, 2010

Mac Decals and Other Cute Finds

I remember seeing a Macbook decal ages ago of Snow White holding the apple logo. I thought it was spiffy, and clever, but I'd probably never buy it. Now, I'm known to peruse Etsy from one random product to the next, so that somehow I start at sparrow earrings and end at a glazed jar with a Native American orca symbol on it. Today I happened to start at a cute painting of turtles swimming in the ocean, and somehow came upon a Mac decal shop. It's called MacSlaps, and not only can you get this insanely cute Lego decal for just $12, but there's also a Mr. Potatohead, a VW Bus, and other cute designs. I definitely fell in love with the little Lego man over there. I just love the look on his face. It looks like he's making the sound that the little green martian toys in Toy Story make when they're in awe of something. And their mouths start at one side of their faces and travel to the other side as they go "Oooooooooo!" Too cute.

Then I stumbled upon, where they have about 100 cute wallet designs and it boggles my mind how any site can have that many wallet designs ready for shipping. I mean, I really cannot even wrap my mind around how many insanely cute designs there are. But that isn't even IT! They have accessories and clothing and, my favorite, stationary! And decorative accents. I might explode.  Everything is of a normal price, as well. Except for maybe this rather ordinary-seeming lamp, which is actually $2,500.

I had some other findings from a few days ago, but of course I can't remember where they went or what they even were. Apparently if I don't blog it right away, it's lost forever, because I know I'll never find it again. Guess I've learned my lesson.

Thursday, June 3, 2010

Several Brief Reasons Why I No Longer Want an iPhone

I recently purchased a new phone, as my pink Blackberry was driving me positively batty with the web browser taking seven minutes to load a webpage and half the apps never working. I've been dreaming of an iPhone for ages now. I have an iPod Touch, you see, so I have an unnatural obsession with stupid apps that waste hours of a day. I just love the smooth transitions of the screen and how modern and sleek everything looks. I've long been pleading with the gadget gods to make them release a Verizon iPhone. I'd never switch to AT&T. However, then they announced the Droid.

See, the Droid intrigued me. I never had a chance to play with one, but I was curious. Nevertheless, I still had hopes of a Verizon iPhone. I was still clinging to that hope, even as it seemed less and less likely to happen. Then they announced the Droid Incredible, which I wish I could've gotten, if it wasn't so damn expensive. I've heard it's better than the iPhone and I wouldn't doubt it. People seem to think that the only good programmers and designers work for Apple. But somebody went out there and found some better ones.

So I got a Droid Eris. And I'm basically in love with it. It's sleek and sexy and makes me forget the iPhone completely. And I have an iPad now too, but that's beside the point.

I just read today that AT&T is phasing out unlimited data plans. Now, from what I know, that's only for new customers. The options actually involve less money per month than the standard $30 smartphone fee. While that might be pretty attractive to others, it isn't to me. What I love about my phone is not having to worry about how much I use it, and if you know me at all, I have problems with worrying too much. I like my unlimited data plan freedom. I also liked the guy who helped my mother and I find phones at the Verizon store up here, because he was crazy helpful and upbeat and never irritated that our account was all kinds of messed up. I could never be nice and cheerful all the time like that. People who can do that must be from another planet or something.

Speaking of which, and this is completely unrelated, but the most miserable people on earth go through express lanes at grocery stores. I swear, it's like the world is about to end if I'm not sure which freaking cigarettes they're asking me for. Someone yesterday said something about how I should know the cigarettes and I was like "I'm sorry, but do you expect Giant Eagle to have some online training program for cigarette brands? No. I get minimum wage to do this and if you want your smokes that bad, you can wait an extra couple seconds." I'm not sure how much of that I actually said out loud, but, you know, I meant it and stuff.

Friday, May 28, 2010

Remembering Lost, and Reflections on Characters

Lost ended last week. I feel kind of empty now, unable to look forward to crazy cliffhangers and waiting eight months for a new season. The finale left me feeling good about everything overall, and in typical Lost style, they left unanswered questions that people will probably be arguing about on forums for years. That doesn't bother me. I just don't know what people were expecting. If it was some shocking, ground-breaking twist, it wouldn't be the series finale, just another cliffhanger. Didn't you people want closure? I mean, the Losties created the sideways world in "death" so that they could find each other again and pass on into heaven together. People seemed to want to cling onto the sci-fi elements with the electromagnetism and Dharma stations and whatnot, but I liked the closure. And I loved Vincent running back in at the end, because that's the first thing Jack saw when he opened his eye in the pilot. And the shoe hanging from the tree. If I ever have a yellow lab someday, I'll name it Vincent. Partly after Vincent from Lost, and partly after Vincent Valentine from Final Fantasy 7, because he's kickass.

Naturally I bawled my eyes out when it was ending. And then, even worse, my mother called me bawling HER eyes out. Definitely not what I needed to hear, because if anything upsets me, it's my mother crying. So I bawled more. And then Stephen and I watched Kimmel. And then we went to bed, but I laid there for hours contemplating the show. Not really all the mysteries and questions, but just the characters in general. I mean, as a fiction writer, I adore characters. I haven't really been working on anything big in awhile, but back in the day I was absolutely in love with my characters. I still think of them and smile. They become so real. I can't hear Matthew Fox's voice and not think of Jack. Jack! What a guy. I feel like I know him. I feel like I could walk into a hospital and see him. I'll miss these people so they're my family. I'll miss Hurley and Charlie and Sawyer and Locke...not Kate though. She can go away. I loved Daniel Faraday. His voice alone was perfect. He was the perfect person to have around to try to explain time travel. Aw man, and Desmond! The journey of this show has been such a wonderful ride. It feels sort of like Harry Potter to me, because as the years went by and I found out more of the story, I grew and changed just like the characters did. I think I also loved it so much because it was an epic. The mythology of the Island was so deep and strange and mysterious. Stories of its inhabitants went back hundreds of years. And I'll totally miss formulating theories about Richard Alpert's eyeliner and whether he was once an Egyptian pharoah. And that pesky statue. And the smoke monster! And seeing the promos and ads a million times with Jack and his crazy beard maniacally shouting "WE HAVE TO GO BACK!"

Ah, those were the days. I'll really miss you, Lost. I hope I see pop culture references to you for years to come. And I hope they make that awesome Dharma alarm clock someday, because I would pay at least $100 for it.

Thursday, May 20, 2010

Getting Used to this "No School Ever Again" Thing

It's been nearly a month since I graduated. Since then, the job-hunt has been at full-throttle. Well, maybe at three-quarters-throttle. Getting out of school for good has left me feeling incredibly lazy. I've told myself that I only get a month of that, though. I'm gearing up for this stuff. I've been researching Pittsburgh publishing houses, hoping for a low position or an internship or something, and feeling like my chances are good since most of them are small and independent. Those are usually more fun, anyway. More personality, less people. I've also been stewing over some new writing ideas, which is something else I'm going to really be diving into in June. I feel like I want to write something short, which is good for submitting to magazines, but I don't want to do any normal story. Of course I bet every writer says that. But in my senior seminar class, we read a story entitled "Sagittarius" and I can't remember the author, but it was something that I'd like to write. It was grounded in a world that we can easily envision, but had a real fantasy element to it that was really believable. I loved that. A classmate wrote a story like that a couple semesters earlier, as well. I think that if I have to write short stories in order to get anywhere, those are the kind I'll write.

It's getting harder and harder to work somewhere that doesn't give raises for promotions, especially when the new job requires tons more responsibility and care. Even worse, the supervising position doesn't get a raise either. I don't understand where my motivation is to do this job well. I mean, I will, because that's just how I work, but I really wish there was more motivation. I really had no idea it was like this in such places. I mean, not from an inside perspective at least. It makes me want to get inside of Wal-Mart and see what's going on there. It's really repulsive, and I'm actually mulling over writing a letter to these people. I mean, this company is making so much more money thanks to recent promotions, and coworkers are telling me that none of it is translating to us peons, and that things are actually going to get much worse in a month or two. I go in tonight at 6:30, and I think I'm going to ask some questions and get some more information. It's really sad how much shit these people have to deal with on a daily basis with very few incentives to keep doing what they're doing. And you know what? The people I work with now are literally some of the nicest coworkers I've ever had, who are helpful and patient and, for some reason, extremely loyal to the company. Maybe there's just something I haven't figured out yet. Either way, I'll definitely be asking some questions tonight.

As a random tidbit, I'm going to be downgrading my cell phone very soon in order to save cash. If any of you have any idea what kind of person I am, you know that losing my Blackberry and all its smartphone capabilities will be a total blow to my geek lifestyle. No more tweeting, no more searching for how long the Hot Dog Shoppe is open, no more foursquare, no more obsessively checking the doppler radar as soon as a cloud floats across the sky. But I'm a firm believer in taking one for the team, nowadays. I may just have a dinky little texting phone for a little while, but as a result we'll be closer to saving money for a vacation and other necessary things. And I'll take a vacation over the doppler radar any day.

Thursday, May 6, 2010

HAZ DIPLOMA!!! And the Devil's Pepperoncini

Well it turns out my fears were based on the usual sort of panic that sets in at the end of every semester and never comes to fruition. Not that that's a bad thing. My GPA is actually the best it's been since I started Pitt. But screw Pitt. I'm out of that bitch faster than Stephen's father's dog can slaughter six bunnies.

And father bought me an iPad. Gaze upon it in all its newfangled glory. And ignore my distorted face. But on second thought, look at my teeth. I have really straight teeth.

Graduation, however, may have been one of the worst experiences I've ever had, even in light of the whole getting-the-eff-out-of-Pitt thing. It was rainy, humid, we had to stand in this confined area for like two hours before we even went into the ceremony, and then we sat there for 2.5 hours listening to Pitt's largest donor (who, surprise, got an honorary degree, then spoke for about 30 minutes about war and other political crap) and watching the nerdy doctoral students hug all of the deans. My friend and I spent most of this time flipping through the program that they gave us, which was considerably larger than the one they gave to the friends and family crowd. My theory is that they did this so that we'd have something to do so as not to fall out of our chairs in utter boredom. I read all of the titles of the doctoral students' theses. They were kind of ridiculous. I wish there had been a sudoku or something.

The last half hour was actually stuff that was relevant to us, the several thousand people wearing vinyl gowns that let no heat escape and dorky hats that itched our foreheads. And then it was over, and some confetti shot out, and nobody threw their hats, and we all got up and left. I came away from it in a very sour mood from having to sit there while rich people shared their political beliefs with us. I was also swimming in my own sweat, as everyone else was, because we might as well have been wearing saran wrap. But we escaped unscathed, and proceeded to go to Olive Garden for dinner.

I had been craving their salad for weeks. As anyone who goes there knows, they put two pepperoncinis in each salad. I eat them all, because even though they're slightly too hot to be comfortable, I just freaking love them and I can't help it. Well, somebody must have planted the Devil's Pepperoncini in this salad. I bit off the whole thing, instantly knew something was wrong, and spent the next fifteen minutes feeling like my tongue was going to fall out in dried-up flakes. Bread actually made it worse. Water helped immensely, until I stopped drinking it. It was quite possibly the hottest pepper I've ever eaten in my life; at least five times hotter than any jalapeno I've ever had. So of course the Devil's Pepperoncini stayed with me for the next 24 hours, burning holes in my stomach lining and intestines. The sad part is I'll still eat pepperoncinis. I mean, they're so good, how can I resist?

Now, I'm itching to go water my new plant outside and perhaps repot a couple of the others, so I'm basically just going to post this picture of our new kitty, Sophie, and let you gaze at her gorgeousness without much explanation from me. She's a sweetheart. We adore her, even when she plays with Stephen's feet at 2 AM and talks to herself all night.

Friday, April 23, 2010

Guise, I am dun wif skool* OMGZ. Can has diploma?

This past week has been literally un-freaking-believable. I told work I couldn't come in at all this week (I was only scheduled two four-hour shifts, but whatev) because I had so much to do. My huge senior seminar thesis was due Wednesday afternoon, and so I literally spent every single free moment cranking out 50 pages and making a table of contents and a cover and all that crap. And usually when people say "I spent every single free moment" doing something, they're exaggerating. But I'm not. I'm totally cereal about this. And! Also on Wednesday I had a developmental psychology final and a russian fairy tales final. So you see, I was living the college dream of not showering for days (because I had no time, not out of laziness) and eating Cheerios for every meal of the day. And I didn't have enough time to study for psych as much as I wanted. So, I feel fabulous after turning in my fiction project. I head off to psych, go through the first page of questions, and realize I've skipped three of the five. I go back to them at the end, but really? Not good. Confidence level basically plummeted at that point. And if I don't pass that test, and get a decently solid C on it, I probably won't pass the class and probably won't graduate. But I won't know until after the ceremony. So how flipping fantastic is it that I have to walk, toss my damn hat in the hair, and possibly not graduate? Yeah. Real flipping fantastic.

But alas. Yesterday was a great day in spite of all that. Stephen and I planned to go down to Mellon Arena to sit on the lawn and watch the game on the big screens outside. But since he's a master haggler, he got us amazing tickets for an amazing price. And I've never been more excited in my life. I took pictures with the blackberry, but since it's a freaking piece of crap, it won't upload them and keeps telling me there's an error. I don't think it's ever uploaded pictures very well, and it's pissing me off. But the game went to three overtimes and there were so many amazing, great moments. I've never been so into a game. It was unreal, how intense it was. My throat was killing me when we left and it's still pretty hoarse today. Stephen had to wake up at 3 AM to go to work but we stayed the whole time. Dedication, man. It was such a fitting way to leave Mellon Arena, since we'll probably never step food inside again before they demolish it. We saw almost two whole games. Still in awe. We probably shouldn't have spent that money last night on tickets (it was kind of bill money, lol) but I told him several times last night that it was probably the best decision we've ever made. I would do it again in a heartbeat, even though we lost. But it's ok. Game tomorrow. That's when it ends for good.

*See first paragraph

Monday, April 5, 2010

I am Still Lazy, but now in a Different Way

I am now lazy because I should be working on my story for workshop on Wednesday. I only have to do a couple pages for it, but I really just don't want to. So what'd I start doing instead? Rifling through my Pictures folder, which is basically where I dump any interesting or humorous image that I come across on the web. You can only imagine what's in there, right? Yeah, about a hundred or so absolutely random pictures, none of which I can give credit to, because I have no idea how I got them. But none of them are mine. I just found them. But I'd like to share a few of my favorites, because they make me giggle, and perhaps they'll make their way into your own random picture folders.*

This first one is a screencap from's 2009 April Fool's joke. It warrants explanation, and since the picture is so tiny, you have to click on it and view it in all its glory to really see why. Firstly, Expedia went all out on this, and I was so disappointed that they didn't do anything this year. "Save over $3 Trillion!" So, so classic. Now, the whole  thing is so extravagant, and that alone is enough to make me giggle with joy. But while you're scanning the image and giggling along with me, your eyes will fall on the ten tabs that I have open in Firefox, eight of which involve female circumcision. And you'll think "WTF?" but it was for a paper. So, you know, leave me alone.

And the rest of these don't really need any explaining, so I'll leave you to enjoy them. And since I'm a loser, Caturday will return this coming Saturday, and later in the week I'll probably post some crazy rant about how I graduate in less than a month and I'm freaking out and I've totally checked-out mentally.**

* Unless, of course, I'm the only one who has a random picture folder, but I seriously doubt it.

** Probably why I don't want to write my crap.

Sunday, March 21, 2010

I am Lazy.

But soon, that will all come to an end! The return of Saturday is Caturday next week, plus an interesting idea I've been mulling over for the past year or so. Since I don't expect hundreds of job offers to come flying my way after graduation in a couple months, I need something to occupy my time. Not only am I going to be doing some serious working (at a low-paying job that is nowhere close to my area of interest), but I am going to be setting writing deadlines for myself in order to facilitate the completion of my mega-WIP. And it is mega, because I have been literally formulating nonstop for about a month now in regards to the plot and such. Just yesterday I shrugged off studying for my Developmental Psychology exam because of a sudden spike in brilliance. And then I proceeded to scribble a couple pages of stream-of-consciousness formulating involving random things such as names of stars (the planetary sort) and an evil corporation of Shinra-proportions.

But back to that thing I've been mulling over. I think I'm going to start reviewing books. In all honesty, of all the instruction I've received about fiction in the past four years...I should be pretty good at it. And since most of that instruction has been in short stories, I've been instructing myself in novels, because that is what I write. I can't write short stories, because I want all of that space. I want epic plots and such. The thing is (Stephen says "There's always a thing"), I've read book reviews that are And I don't want that. I want to look at style and clarity and roundness/flatness of characters and the opening and lots of other things in addition to the regular plot and enjoyability stuff. And I refuse to use a five-star model. I'll probably have something like seven categories, all of which will be scored out of 10, with pertinent examples and such. For the style section I'll include examples of sentences I enjoyed, etc. And then I'll average all my numbers for the overall score. I don't plan on being a light reviewer. I'll be very, very in-depth, and I probably won't be able to do more than one per week, if that.

Well, we'll see about all of this after I do all of that stuff I should be doing instead, such as editor query letters and studying and other such things. In the meantime, enjoy this photo I just found from Snowmageddon 2010 Pittsburgh, which I took with my Blackberry from my office window. A squirrel...having found his nuts at last, stares at me after I spent several days watching as he dug through the snow in search of them.

Monday, February 22, 2010

The Dumbest Thing I've Ever Done

I don't think I've ever been as embarrassed as when this happened yesterday afternoon. When I tweet music I'm listening to, I copy and paste the music note symbol because I like it. I have no idea how to make it myself on the keyboard. Thus, the following tweets by me:
♫ "Big Machine" - The Goo Goo Dolls ( #pandora Used to listen to this song on the band bus to away games. Good times.

GOOD GOD. While attempting to embolden text in Word, I accidentally hit command+V. I NOW KNOW HOW TO MAKE A ♫ WITHOUT COPYING AND PASTING.

♫♫♫♫♫ (I MADE THOSE MYSELF!) "Glycerine" live and acoustic - Bush ( #pandora

*several minutes pass*

Well, now wait a minute. I must be the most idiotic person on earth. I just realized command+V is the paste shortcut...

I wasn't sure how to react after the world's worst blonde moment. I guess eating peanut butter out of a 3lb jar with a butter knife was a good follow-up, though.

Thursday, February 11, 2010

If it plays ringtone-like Beyonce music, it's not Monopoly.

EDIT (3-7-10): apparently lost their image of the new monopoly, and replaced it with a fuzzy screencap of two guys. No idea how to explain this. The article is still there though. I'm hoping it gets fixed though. Trying to imagine how those two images could have been mixed up really boggles my mind.

Guys, this is kind of tragic. I just had to share this with you. I have a pot of hot chai tea calling my name, but I'm fending that desire off just so that I can freak out a little about this.

I clicked on Safari the other day, and my homepage (Yahoo!) pops up as usual. I see a curious link that reads "'Monopoly' Gets a Makeover, but Will Die-Hard Fans Buy It?" I click it. And this disgusting abomination meets my eyes:

What in the HELL. "...with debit cards and an ATM instead of paper money and a banker, clear plastic representations of the classic tokens (bye-bye, little boot!), and clips of popular songs (like Rihanna’s 'Umbrella,' Daniel Powter’s 'Bad Day,' and Beyonce's 'Crazy in Love') that play after certain actions." Excuse me, but if this game is playing Beyonce, it's not Monopoly anymore. Monopoly doesn't play music. It is a very simple game that is SQUARE and has pewter tokens and colorful greenbacks and...and...*bursts into tears*

It's also a game that I never, ever win. So I guess this doesn't affect me much, because I only try my luck semi-annually, if that. Hmph.

Well that was all. Time for tea.

Tuesday, February 9, 2010

Snowmageddon in Pittsburgh

Here's how you know I like to resist fate (even though I'm a pretty extreme existentialist). Stephen and I sat in the leasing office of an apartment complex in Greentree a week or so ago, contemplating whether or not we should wait to move in til March, or to just take the one that was open now. I happen to believe that certain songs come on for special reasons. You see, for a few days before that moment, I had been serenading Stephen with "Every Rose has its Thorn." Not for any particular reason except to keep him from sleeping at night. I haven't heard that song played in public for at least five years, and while we were sitting in the leasing office, that song came on. And I looked at Stephen and said "It's a sign. We're taking the apartment." And I could have taken the impending storm as a very bad sign, but it wasn't going to happen. And that was that.

We signed the lease on February 5th. That day happened to be the first day of the Snowpocalypse / Snowmageddon / #snOMGpgh in Pittsburgh. The snow started at around noon. I got two carfuls of junk here, Stephen got two carfuls of junk here, and then twenty inches of snow fell. And all we had to eat were chips. So since Stephen and I are lovers of food and cannot possibly go a day without a meal, we opted to brave the roads the next day to go down the road to Giant Eagle. It's now Tuesday, and Pitt has been closed the last two days. It's kind of unprecedented, because Pitt NEVER closes. But I think there would be rioting if they didn't close. That is, there would be rioting if people could actually get out of their homes, which they can't.

Then we found out another storm was coming. And could drop another ten inches. And Stephen is irate because the shovel-napping neighbors stole his parking spot, which he spent several hours snowblowing, shovelling, and salting*. On his way back to his parents' to drop off the snowblower, someone drove down and thought "Gasp! Look at this beautiful, clean parking spot! Someone must have done a lot of hard work to do this!" Then they pulled in. Of course, the neighbors have begun to both fear and respect us** and as soon as we got back, they moved the interloping car and were very friendly about the mistake. Today, he left for his physical therapy appointment, and a Mini Cooper pulled into the spot. Those particular people seemed ignorant of the events of the previous night, though, so we'll have to do something about that.

Well, I'm going to document round two of Snowmageddon. Later or tomorrow I'd like to post a progressive look at the snowfall from my window. And I hope I'm sitting right here by this time tomorrow, too. Pitt cancelling classes yet another day would be cause for serious celebration.***

* best boyfriend on earth
** by "us" I mean Stephen
*** lots of beer

Tuesday, January 12, 2010

Glaceon pwns you, and your pitiful Meowth.

So sometime during that month or so that I disappeared for, I created this draft and titled it. And for the sake of my own amusement, I'm going to keep the title, even though it's as relevant to this post as learning about Kant in your bioengineering class. But for a quick explanation, December for some reason was "Change-Your-Profile-Picture-To-Your-Favorite-Pokemon" month on Facebook. So being a girl back in the glory days of Pokemon in America, I was naturally an Eevee fan. Cute little kitten-like thing. And then Eevee gained like, six awesome evolved forms. I don't really remember or know the mechanics, so don't crucify me for any wrongness about this. But Glaceon is one of those forms, and I just happened to like it. But I also kind of wanted to use Lickitung, because that thing is freaking hilarious. Or Psyduck! Psyduckpsyduckpsyduckpsyduck. Cute as hell.

Anyway, I've started my last semester at Pitt. My prediction is that I will eat large quantities of sushi and drink many cups of tea before I finally graduate. I will also hate at least two of my classes, possibly three. Of course I'm worried about my fiction class too, because I not only have to write like five pages to show in class for each class (that's twice a week folks) but I have to form a master work of 50+ pages by the end of the semester. And it has to be good this time. All other times I've just written crap so that it's done. I don't like most of what I've written for my fiction classes because I hate writing short stories. I started writing novels in fourth grade. I had never written a short story before my junior year at Pitt. But now I have the chance to write the first fifty pages of a novel, and I have a grand idea, and I'm gonna write it dammit! And hope that it doesn't, you know, end up being not-so-grand and stuff.

That's all for now. Speaking of "that's all," I bought the first volume of Looney Tunes on DVD and it may have been the smartest purchase of my life. "The Rabbit of Seville" is probably the most brilliant cartoon ever. But anywho, hopefully more soon, since I'm once again unemployed.